A List of Funny Questions
by Category

A list of funny questions to ask about animals, consumers, earth, education, food, health, legal, people, shopping, sport and time.

A List of Funny Questions by Category:

ANIMALS

• Why does milk go bad when it is not refrigerated but stays fresh in a cow that is not refrigerated?
• Why don't woodpeckers get headaches from slamming their faces on trees all day?
• What are you supposed to do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
• What color would a chameleon in a room full of mirrors be?
• Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?
• Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if it no longer works afterwards?
• Do one legged ducks swim in circles?
• If a Bullterrier is a cross between a Bull dog and a Terrier what would you call a cross between a Bull dog and a Shitsu?
• Why do we call dogs bitches when cats fit the description better?

CONSUMER

• How can something be "new" and "improved"? What was it improving on if it is new?
• Do dentists go to other dentists or do they do it themselves?
• Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers when there are no steam involved whatsoever?
• Do Atheists get insurance for acts of God?
• How does a shelf salesman keep his store from looking empty?
• If FEDEX an UPS were to merge, would they call it FED UP?
• If psychic were really psychic, wouldn't they call you first?
• Do crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
• If you instruct a cab driver to reverse, would he end up paying you?
• Why is it called a TOOTHbrush when you brush all of your teeth at the same time?

EARTH

• If Pluto had earthquakes what would they be called?
• If it is true that the world is coming to an end in 2012 according to the Mayan Calender on which planet will the 2020 Olympics be held?
• How much deeper would the sea be if sponges didn't grow there?
• What would happen to the sea level if all the boats in the world were taken out at once?
• If you own a piece of land, do you own it all the way to the centre of the earth?
• If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
• If you yell at plants instead of talking to them, would they still grow, only to be troubled and insecure?
• When you see a heat wave, should you wave back?

EDUCATION

• Is the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
• Why is it that we "get into hot water" when we "skate on thin ice"?
• If there is an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?
• If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?
• If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
• If a book about failure doesn't sell, is it a success?
• Is 12-15 years in school really worth it if you can only remember how to read, write, use a calculator and a map?
• When schools say they are preparing children for the future and highly educated people are of the opinion that the future is looking bleak, what exactly do they prepare for?
• If you live in a three storey house and you were on the second level, were you upstairs or downstairs?

FOOD

• Why is vanilla ice cream white if vanilla extract is brown?
• Why can't you buy a Hotdog at McDonalds?
• Why is "never take candy from strangers" not applicable when we celebrate Halloween?
• Why do they put holes in crackers?
• If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from?
• Do cannibals get drunk when they eat drunk people?

HEALTH

• If a doctor has a heart attack while doing surgery, do the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?
• If an ambulance run someone over while on their way to help someone else, do they stop or go?

LEGAL

• Is it legal to travel in reverse as long as you follow the direction of the traffic?
• If the only witness says "no" when asked to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, what does the court do?
• How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

PEOPLE

• Who said: "Quit while you are ahead" if quitters never win and winners never quit?
• If a compulsive liar tells you he is a compulsive liar do you believe him?
• Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person?
• When two men "marry" do they go to the same bachelor party?
• Why do superheroes wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?
• What did the first woman ever to shave her legs use?
• Does anybody ever vanish with a trace?
• If people from Poland are called Poles, why don't they call people from Holland Holes?
• Can't the postman give it to the garbage man and save us the hassle?
• Why don't black guys get white tattoos?
• Why do they call it Alcoholics Anonymous meetings when the first thing they do is stand up and say their names.

SHOPPING

• Why don't they make curtains double sided so it looks nice on both sides of your home?
• Is there ever a week that mattresses are not on sale?
• If an escalator breaks down, does its name change to stairs?

SPORT

• How is the handicapped parking situation handled at the Special Olympics?
• What would you say to a golfer if you were a golf ball and you could speak?
• If sports commentators always know better why aren't they on the field?
• If you look at packed sports stadiums are spectators all the people who wished they could play?
• Why are all of the most popular sports played with a ball, can't they find/invent something new?

TIME

• Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
• Can you daydream at night time?
• What if you don't have time for a time management course?

MORE FUNNY QUESTIONS:
Funny Questions Vol.1 Funny Questions Vol.2 Funny Questions Vol.3
Funny Questions Vol.4 Funny Rhetorical Questions Funny One-Liner Jokes Funny Quips Funny Things to Say Witty Quips Funny Stupid List

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