Say Surprising Things

by Nimrod Jones
(England)

Open your eyes really wide, look deadly serious, make eye contact with someone in a conversation that you aren't actually part of, then mutter random words (e.g: future femur lemur llama peninsula overbearing crustacean...)

Stop speaking in the middle of your sentence, then act as though you never said anything. e.g:
PERSON 1: Was there meant to be a test today?
PERSON 2: Oh, no I hope not - I think it's -"
(stares passively into distance)
PERSON 1: It's what?"
PERSON 2: Huh? Oh, the test. Mrs. Smith said -
(repeats over and over again)

Tell yourself chemistry jokes and laugh really loudly. If anyone talks to you, ignore them.

Crawl under the table and say that the ceiling is trying to intimidate you.

Beg teachers for money and food.

Pass notes to the teacher saying things like "make sure we don't get caught passing notes in class!"

Mouth words conspicuously across the class to a friend... they don't necessarily have to be real words.