Top 10 Funny Things To Say
Of All Time

We all experience situations where funny things to say can save the day!

Comedians make a living from it, but we don't all have that natural gift! Fortunately for us, we can have some fun reading these funny sayings!

When you read through "funny things to say" some things will just stay with you forever and you'll find many situations in life where a simple line will turn a boring conversation around or simply save the day for someone else!


Funny sayings, Grafiti, Frame, Creative Art

Graffiti Wall Frame - Also called "THE WALL"
More about The Wall below!


Seriously funny things to say for more mature minds!
Here we go....the best sayings of all time!

Top 10 Funny Things To Say...

  1. I’d like to help you out today. Which way did you come in?
  2. Answers are what we have for other people's problems.
  3. Excuse my naivety - I was born at a very early age.
  4. I'm not as think as you confused I am!
  5. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  6. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
  7. Take my advice — I'm not using it.
  8. It is not that I trust you. I am just feeling lazy today.
  9. Whatever it is that is eating you, it must be suffering horribly.
  10. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

Fun Things To Say!



MORE FUNNY THINGS TO SAY...

  • The only thing I understand about Algebra: I look at my X and I wonder Y
  • If you want to look young and thin, hang out around fat old people.
  • Whoever said money don't buy you happiness just didn't know where to shop!
  • If you think no one cares if you're dead or alive miss a couple of credit card payments.
  • A guy walks into a bar ... OUCH!
  • We consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm.
  • If you lend someone money and you never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
  • A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that you can get from your wife for free.
  • I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.
  • Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.
  • I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. (Naughty Zsa Zsa Gabor!)
  • An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
  • Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.

VIEW MORE FUNNY SAYINGS FROM OUR READERS BELOW!




THE WALL (Picture at the top)

Fun stuff we do: A great way to archive funny sayings!

We have a dedicated "Graffiti Wall" in our home. Once in a while you hear something that you just NEVER want to forget! This is the place to write it down where you will see it often and never misplace it!
The WALL is called "THE WALL" but it's actually a "picture" hanging on a real wall, it's a framed masterpiece plus...

  1. The sayings are funny
  2. It must be something someone said
  3. Something you never want to forget
  4. It is a Family Wall, other's must go write the fun stuff they don't want to forget on their own walls!

Your own... meaningful, priceless, irreplaceable ART and its fun to do! The sentiments a wall like this carry is priceless!

Our funny things to say "Wall" includes some of those unforgettable moments when toddlers used new words out of context, couldn't pronounce them properly and funny comments uttered in our home, to name a few! All written down with a date. Once each block is filled a glass cover is secured over the picture to preserve these precious momentos and we start the next one.

Easy to make: Create and print a sheet of paper with colors / shapes any way you like, have it enlarged by a professional printer on glossy paper and framed if you want it to last a long time. Start jotting down those funnies with a permanent marker.




Did you hear someone say something
Very Funny this week?

Do you have a Funny Saying to share? Did you perhaps hear someone deflate a tense situation or save someone's day with something FUNNY they've said? Tell us about the funny things your kids and grandchildren say! Tell us about funny things your parents say! Tell us about funny things you hear at work! Tell us about the funny things YOU say! We'd love to hear, share it with us! Write at least 300 words (a few funny sayings) if you want to create your own page on FUN STUFF TO DO, otherwise use the comment form below!

What Other Visitors Have Said

Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...

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Click here to write your own.

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Funny sayings about brothers Not rated yet
He's a 29 year old who acts like a five year old; he deserves crappy stuff for Christmas. The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh …

What Math Really Means Not rated yet
MATH, to sum it all up for you, stands for: Mental Abuse Towards Humans. I was great at Math until they decided to mix the alphabet in it. Y must …

Uncontrollable sneezes Not rated yet
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Family Funny Sayings Not rated yet
First thing you do, check if you boyfriends family tree is a cactus, if it is you will know everybody on it is a prick. Why pay money to have your family …

Click here to write your own.

Funny saying about life. Not rated yet
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Funny Birth Sayings Not rated yet
You must have been born on a highway. That's where most accidents happen. When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half. …

Over the hill and can see the lighter side of life  Not rated yet
Received a few sayings about the lighter side of life today, some are funny, some true and some funny and true. Here goes, enjoy: ~ Money will buy a …

How to deal with annoying questions Not rated yet
Jim: what ya up to Bob: talking to you Jim: except that Bob: on google Jim: searching for what Bob: how to get a loser to stop talking to you Jim: …

Boy talking to his grandad - funny Not rated yet
My mate was sitting with his grandad and was listening to his stories about when he was young. He suddenly turned around and asked his grandad: "What else …

Funny Saying About Issues Not rated yet
Gσt A Problem?...Solνe It! Can't Stand Mε?...Sit Down! Cαn't Face Me?...Wεll Turn Around!

about life Not rated yet
So this friend boasts about his skydiving experience and the other one replies: I've never been skydiving.. but I have zoomed-in on Google Earth really …

Funny sayings about food Not rated yet
I once got a happy meal at McDonald's and then asked them to supersize it! I'm the kind of person who would come out of the gym... and go straight to …

Funny saying about Math Not rated yet
After careful consideration of X: Maybe algebra teachers are really just pirates that's why they want us to find the "X"!!! :o

Funny Debt Not rated yet
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Funny Saying About Life:-) Not rated yet
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Funny Sayings From and About Stars Not rated yet
Anything is possible. Justin Timberlake proved it by bringing sexy back. Married life is so easy, you only have one woman to satisfy. - Will Smith …

Funny sayings about girls that are full of themselves Not rated yet
I'd deal with your fullness if I didn't just have lunch. ABRACADABRA!! Nope, didn't work, you're still a bitch. Some spend so much time focusing …

Son And Dad Funny Not rated yet
Son: Dad I'm hungry. Dad: Hi hungry. Son: Dad I'm serious. Dad: But I thought you were... Son: Ahhh! Never mind dad! Dad: Hahaha!

FUNNY SAYINGS ABOUT BEING SMART Not rated yet
Are you SMART? Then spell it ...... S-M-A-R-T ....NO YOU SHOULD SPELL THE WORD "IT". Don't eat nuts, if you "are what you eat". Smart people seem …

Marriage Not rated yet
What is the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 min. What is the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lbs.

Funny saying about onions Not rated yet
My friend told me that onions are the only food that makes you cry, that was before I accidentally hit him in the face with a watermelon...

Funny things my room mate says Not rated yet
Once, my roommate said "Trying to be a good person is harder than nailing jello to the ceiling" "Its not about what you are but, ehh who cares we are …

a 6-year-old's innocence Not rated yet
Student: "When were you born Mr. Chris?" Teacher: "I was born in 1981." Student: "Oh...So you were born in ancient times." Teacher: Burst out …

Funny sayings about swim wear for the older figure Not rated yet
This is so funny - Mature woman looking for swimwear When I was a child in the 1960s, the bathing suit for the mature figure was-boned, trussed and …

Rich Seafood Not rated yet
Imagine how lobsters would feel if they knew how expensive they were.

Your PEOPLE just left - A funny thing to say Not rated yet
My friend: OH, MY Gosh. You won't believe what happened. Blah - blah - blah (starts talking about something) and carries on and on. Me: (Interrupts …

Funny Saying about the girls in my school Not rated yet
The skirts the girls wear in my school are shorter than spring break! For more funny sayings go: Here! For funny quips and quotes go: Here! …

2012 - 2013 Comedy - Funny Saying Not rated yet
When its 2013, I'm gonna go to the movies, watch 2012 and tell everyone I survived that!

Funny Sayings Images Not rated yet
Here are some funny sayings in image format, not much more to say have a LOOK, these sayings will touch your heart and stretch you laugh lines. View …

Click here to write your own.

WOW REALLY Not rated yet
6th Grade Video: and thats the been gay airplane Class: HAHAHA Me: What maybe it just doesn't fly staight!!! Everyone:HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! …

Just Mean! Not rated yet
Mason: How do you spell awkward? Me: A-W-K-W-A-R-D. Q.T: No!It's M-A-S-O-N! Everybody: Haaa Haa Haaa Ha!!

Funny Saying About Caring Not rated yet
"Hear that? .... It's the sound of nobody caring." America's health care system is neither healthy, caring, nor a system. - Walter Cronkite Happiness …

another typical english lesson Not rated yet
I always get voldermort and shakespear mixed up Teacher: what? Ahaha student: You know they are both just dead cool people!

Funny things Not rated yet
Have you ever noticed that we live in a world were pizza gets to ur house before the police?? __________________________________________________ Men …

Right and wrong sayings and funny quotes Not rated yet
I am always right even when I am right about being wrong. To do a great right do a little wrong. All one can do is hope to end up with the right …

JFK funny saying  Not rated yet
When someone says I didn't tell you to do that or something similar, say well no one told the guy that killed JFK to do it but he did!

Eeww Funny Saying Not rated yet
Eeww what's on your neck... my bad it's your head Eeww what's on your face... my bad it's your nose Eeww what's on your hand... my bad it's your fingers …

Funny Saying Instead of Cursing Not rated yet
You're an apple.....haha Reply: You're a pip....haha

The Best Funny Sayings in General Not rated yet
When I die I want to go peacefully, like my grandfather did in his sleep. Not like the screaming passengers in his car. Do not argue with an idiot. …

I’d like to help you out today. Which way did you come in? - Funny Saying Not rated yet
I’d like to help you out today. Which way did you come in? FUNNY SAYINGS FOR THOSE BORN BETWEEN 1930-1979 FUNNY FRIENDSHIP SAYINGS FOR FRIENDS …

Funny Sayings for your Parents Not rated yet
My parents accused me of lying to them: I screamed at them "santa, tooth fairy, Easter bunny" and walked off like the boss

Annoyingly Funny Sayings Not rated yet
hey apple, apple... apple... apple...........APPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (he said what). You look fruity hahahahahahahahahahaha. …

No Answer Not rated yet
I call my parents and they dont answer, and they call me i dont answer and then all of the sudden it's like World War 3.

Funny things to do at Walmart Not rated yet
Try this. Go to Walmart. Go to the toy section. Take a Dora doll. Put it on the floor in the middle of the aisle. Then go hide. When someone tries to pick …

Funny FUN sayings on Facebook Not rated yet
A life journey of fun will provide you with laugh lines only, no matter how grim life become. When the tough is on, we all head to FUN STUFF TO DO …

Funny Saying About Facebook Not rated yet
Facebook is like jail. We are friends with people we don't know, we get poked by strangers, we waste time, and write on walls. You post all your drama …

lezbians Not rated yet
If lezbians dislike men so much why do they try so bloody hard to look like truck drivers?

The Ball - Funny Saying and Other Quotes Not rated yet
I kept wondering why the ball was getting closer. Then it hit me! Other Funny Sayings and Quotes: No matter where you go – You’re always there! …

I'm A Bandit! Not rated yet
With my hood on and whispering to myself while staring at the floor, "I'm a bandit, and I'm gonna steal all your stuff!!" My boyfriend, Tyler, "You …

Womdingle? Not rated yet
Me: Hey, what's a Womdingle? Friend: Wait, what? Me: You know, a Womdingle... Friend: Where the heck did you hear that from? Me: I don't know... maybe …

GIRLS AND FOOTBALL Not rated yet
WHEN A FOOTBALL TEAM IS CALLED "THE NUGGETS" DOES THAT MEAN THAT THEIR MASCOTT IS A CHICKEN?

LOL - Funny Saying Not rated yet
Guy breaks girls heart. Girl breaks guys PS3. Who cries more?

Friendly Old Fart - Saying - Poem - Disaster - Royal Blunder - Its FUNNY Not rated yet
A fart is a pleasant thing, It gives the belly ease, It warms the bed in winter, And suffocates the fleas. A fart can be quiet, A fart can …

Man Not rated yet
A Man is known by the Company he can or can't keep.

Click here to write your own.



More Funny Sayings And Other
Funny Things To say


Funny Quips - Chapter 1 go: Here!

Funny Quips- Chapter 2 go: Here!

Retirement Quips & Quotes go: Here!

Wickedly Witty Quips go: Here!

A List Of Quips About Money go: Here!

"I AM BORED" (Funny) go: Here!

"Things To Do When Bored" (Seriously!) go: Here!

"What To Do When Bored" (Humorous Advice!) go: Here!


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