Funny Advice For Girls and Daughters About Men
The Seven Dwarfs Names
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If it is true that girls marry men like their
fathers, then it is understandable why so many mothers cry so much at weddings.
Don’t imagine you can change a man — unless he’s in diapers.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.
Never let your man’s mind wander — it’s too little to be out alone.
When SHE cancels a date, it is because...“She has to.”
When HE cancels a date, it is because.. “He has two.”
Men are like trees, they take forever to grow up.
My mom said the only thing men are good for is for vehicle maintenance.
If he asks what sort of books you like, tell him checkbooks.
Go for younger men. You might as well — they never mature anyway.
If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.
Men are all the same — they just have different faces so that you can tell them apart.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. “Women marry men with the hope they will change. “Then they are both disappointed.”
Definition of a bachelor: a man who missed the opportunity to make a woman miserable.
Women don’t make fools of men; most of them are the DIY type.
A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.
Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he is too old to do it.
Love is blind, marriage is a real eye-opener.
Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.
If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn’t ask for directions.
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
Remember a good sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes; it means that you laugh at all of his... every time.
Whenever you date a guy, think, is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
If a man tells you he would go to the end of the earth for you... tell him to stay there.
Men who have pierced ears are better marriage material, they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
The thought patterns of a man...
"Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, sushi, classical music, and even how to invest in the stock market to provide money," said the man.
"Sounds like you may be bitter because she changed you so drastically," remarked his friend.
"I'm not bitter. Now that I'm so improved, she just isn't good enough for me."
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